For this workshop, you will perform the paramedic method on the first paragraph of your partner's essay. In order to receive credit for the workshop, you must identify all of the "to be" verbs and prepositions by changing them to different colors on the draft's Google Doc, then re-writing the paragraph below, eliminating as many "to be" verbs, prepositions, slow wind-ups, and redundancies as you can (and that should be most of them!).
If you finish before the end of class, continue on to the second paragraph. If you don't complete the workshop on time it is due within 24 hours of the end of class.
Once you have completed the workshop, turn it in here:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1PKgoukVTfWsq-5PO4ri1-r4Yswva6wmB8VM9Gut5ZHI/viewform
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Draft Workshop: Style
1. All of your drafts are probably aiming for a middle style. Go through your partner's draft and highlight any words, sentences, or passages in which you think the essay deviates from a middle style (either by being too formal or too informal). If you have time, suggest ways in which the author might revise these sections in order to achieve a more appropriate tone for the assignment.
2. Since writing in the middle style is targeted at a fairly wide audience, unfamiliar terms and concepts need to be defined. Examine the essay and point out any terms that aren't defined that probably should be. For the terms that are defined, are these definitions clear and concise? Does the reader understand everything s/he needs to in order to understand the author's point?
3. Another aspect of the middle style is that it employs concrete nouns (rather than abstract nouns) and action verbs (rather than "to be" verbs). In general, does this essay feel concrete (that is, grounded in things you can see and touch) or abstract (that is, in the world of ideas) to you? Do you think the essay's level of abstraction is appropriate given the audience and the topic? Point out any specific passages in which you think the paper gets too abstract. If you have trouble locating these passages, try searching for "to be" verbs; they often cluster around these types of passages.
4. Did you notice any examples of contentious terms or insensitive language in the draft? If so, point them out and suggest how the writer might replace this with more sensitive language.
When you have completed the workshop, turn it in at the following link:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/16Vn91QerlXn2P_pKpDIg2H9qJt2vw1Yd_O3caiVAzD0/viewform
When you have completed the workshop, turn it in at the following link:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/16Vn91QerlXn2P_pKpDIg2H9qJt2vw1Yd_O3caiVAzD0/viewform
Draft Workshop: Organizational Concerns
1. In what order does the author present his or her supporting evidence (e.g. chronological, process order, cause-and-effect, etc.)? Is this the most appropriate order given the audience's level of understanding? Suggest at least one alternative way in which the essay might be organized.
2. Is there a sense of balance to my essay? Do I spend too long on any single point, or do I seem to rush through important parts? Does any section feel either redundant or underdeveloped?
3. Does each paragraph have a clear topic sentence? Does each topic sentence relate clearly back to the thesis? Does each paragraph deal with one idea and one idea only? Point out any points in the essay at which the paragraphing seems weak or confusing.
4. Does the essay have transitions that move the reader clearly from idea to the next? Does the writer make the relationship between the ideas clear with words that emphasize the essay's organization scheme (e.g. time-related words of the essay is organized chronologically, etc.)?
5. Does each paragraph fully explain its main idea? Do any paragraphs feel thin or under-developed? Point them out.
When you have completed the workshop, turn it in at the following link:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/17v2jmbhm6tY3RlQHQk1-leZ4B-kkkCB_2Rxsxjdtn9w/viewform
When you have completed the workshop, turn it in at the following link:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/17v2jmbhm6tY3RlQHQk1-leZ4B-kkkCB_2Rxsxjdtn9w/viewform
Monday, February 17, 2014
Draft Workshop: Retrospective Outline
Compose a retrospective outline of your partner's paper. Examine the outline for coherence, repetition, overall logic and transitions, and whether you answered the prompt. Write your notes and/or suggestions below the outline.
Second, assess whether the author's primary focus at this point should be conceptual concerns, organizational concerns, or surface-level concerns. Explain your answer with evidence from the draft.
When you have completed the workshop, turn it in here:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1NJOnipRQ9FA1dCF8FEkttr1KrfPYqUmL0YXtr9KAH9I/viewform
When you have completed the workshop, turn it in here:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1NJOnipRQ9FA1dCF8FEkttr1KrfPYqUmL0YXtr9KAH9I/viewform
Draft Workshop 1
1. Summarize, as briefly as possible, the author's main claim. Is it substantive? Could another person reasonably challenge or oppose it?
2. Which of the categories we talked about on Tuesday does the author's introduction fit into? Is it one of the more effective or less effective introductions? If it is one of the less effective introductions, suggest ways that the author might use one of the more effective introduction strategies.
3. A strong introduction should be concise; it should use one of the effective introduction strategies, then transition as quickly as possible to the thesis statement. Are there any sentences in the draft that are extraneous? Could the line between the introduction and the thesis statement be any straighter? If necessary, copy and paste the introduction paragraph below, deleting any sentences you find extraneous.
4. Scan the draft for any sentences that seem wordy or difficult to understand. Paste these sentences below and attempt to revise them, trying your best to use simple sentence forms in which a subject, strong action verb, and direct object come in that order.
5. Compose a list of TWO things that the author should do to improve his or her draft.
When you have completed the workshop, turn it in here:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/16OHfHgowDOkcxzKbtJMfyHz9jJYH8VQOFmtv6mF3pU4/viewform
When you have completed the workshop, turn it in here:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/16OHfHgowDOkcxzKbtJMfyHz9jJYH8VQOFmtv6mF3pU4/viewform
Monday, February 10, 2014
Intro to Draft Workshopping Process
Read through the following draft:
Next, discuss your answers to the following questions aloud in your groups. You do not need to write down your answers.
1. Summarize, as briefly as possible, the author's main claim. Is it substantive? Could another person reasonably challenge or oppose it?
2. Which of the categories we talked about on Tuesday does the author's introduction fit into? Is it one of the more effective or less effective introductions? If it is one of the less effective introductions, suggest ways that the author might use one of the more effective introduction strategies.
3. A strong introduction should be concise; it should use one of the effective introduction strategies, then transition as quickly as possible to the thesis statement. Are there any sentences in the draft that are extraneous? Could the line between the introduction and the thesis statement be any straighter? If necessary, copy and paste the introduction paragraph below, deleting any sentences you find extraneous.
4. Scan the draft for any sentences that seem wordy or difficult to understand. Paste these sentences below and attempt to revise them, trying your best to use simple sentence forms in which a subject, strong action verb, and direct object come in that order.
5. Compose a list of TWO things that the author should do to improve his or her draft.
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Activity: Claims
Read the following article from slate.com:
http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2010/09/the_privilege_of_prejudice.single.html
This article contains appeals of all three types: ethos, pathos, and logos. Work in your groups to identity at least one of each type of appeal in the article. Which of these appeals is most persuasive to you? Why do you think that is the case? In which order does the author present these appeals? Why do you think he chose that order?
http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2010/09/the_privilege_of_prejudice.single.html
This article contains appeals of all three types: ethos, pathos, and logos. Work in your groups to identity at least one of each type of appeal in the article. Which of these appeals is most persuasive to you? Why do you think that is the case? In which order does the author present these appeals? Why do you think he chose that order?
Activity: Thesis Statements
Read the following article:
http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2010/09/the_privilege_of_prejudice.single.html
Work together with your group members to paraphrase a strong thesis statement for this article. Your thesis statement should do each of the three things a good thesis statement should do.
http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2010/09/the_privilege_of_prejudice.single.html
Work together with your group members to paraphrase a strong thesis statement for this article. Your thesis statement should do each of the three things a good thesis statement should do.
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